I rather enjoy this strain of not talking. It makes things easier, since everyone and their mother has way too large a fucking mouth. I almost hope I have bronchitus, so I can have a better excuse not to talk, since my jaw is finally starting to feel better.Current Mood:  drained Current Music: Vapor Transmission |
It's fun to see the effect you have on people.
Thanksgiving has sucked. My family has a nack for fucking up holidays.
I'm on oxycodone. That's very...very fun.
One line paragraphs are highly underrated.Current Mood: Pained Current Music: Pints of Guinness Make you Strong |
Sorry. Feeling rather anti-Bush at the moment.
Anywho, not a lot is up. I've gone from Robert Plant to John Lennon, according to my dad (in reference to my hair). I'm trying to start a DDR club with Morrow at East...mainly because we want to play and haven't in a while. Pathetic...but entertaining nonetheless.
I miss summer, I think. But I'm glad its over. It was like...a trial by fire...a major turning point if you will. When it ended, I was far different than I had been when I first entered it.
I'm getting into my book more. I'm still starved for names...but shit, it works. I've made a shitload of progress, bitch. Ya'll best step back. I do need a scanner rather badly, however. Oh well.
In conclusion...I need to get back into DDR. I'm going to go do that now. Au revoir.Current Mood:  contemplative Current Music: Tsunami Bomb - The Ultimate Escape |
As I stated on my xanga...I sincerely doubt most people will care about today as they did two years or a year prior. A pity...
Work is interesting...I can't decide yet if I like it or not. It's money though, and that's all that really matters in the long run. Well, not really. There's more to it. But I'm goign to be shallow and say that's all that matters.
I've nothing else to say. |
Well, I expected it, I got it, and I wonder how much of an effect it will have. Oh well, I had to have you get it out in the open, it was driving my subconscious mad. Nothing can be done now...'cept to just go with it. Or ignore it completely, which we'll try to do but fail miserably.
It's funny how many of my old friends I don't miss, and yet the ones I do miss are some of the most random choices. What provoked that statement? Cordelia. I dunno, I just miss her (or you, I suppose, if you read this). I wouldn't mind hanging out with you sometime, outside of the damned fencing academy. It'd be really cool, I think. Maybe not, but you never know. Probably won't happen though, and that makes me a tid bit sad.
But for now I'm going to do what I've been doing, which is thinking about how fucked up/cool this school year is gonna be, and how many random people I'll meet. I've definately got a completely different perspective on people now...and of course I'll be listening to the song that gave the title to this entry on repeat, since I love it for a reason I could never really pinpoint.Current Mood: wistful Current Music: The Offspring - No Brakes |
| » Remember, if you will, this one thing... |
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Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
I know...I know...who would have thought someone like me would be even posting something like that. Suck up and deal. It happens.
Sep. 1st, 2004 @ 02:28 pm
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| » I'm not impressed, I guess I'm not impressed, with which dialect which dialect marches best. |
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...And who reaches heaven in what order...when our kids are baptized in mortar.
The unstable creatures are driving me mad as of late, and the only one who was the one I could really confide in is freakin gone til Thursday.
I need a private journal thingy. It'd be interesting to have one...
It's the heart of nuclear winter and I'm scared as hell.
Aug. 28th, 2004 @ 12:02 pm
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| » Fade in, fade out... |
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and back to the status quo we go.
Aug. 24th, 2004 @ 12:14 am
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| » You know what this is missing thus far? |
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A happy entry. Especially since lately it's been following a half emo/half pensive trend, it needs like WOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Somethin like that, at least. Manic Depression rocks when you're on a mania trend. Ya just bob your fuckin head up and down to the music and smile. Natural Stoning, wewt.
On a more dour note (c'mon, there's no way there can be a purely yay entry) - I want to do something today, but I really don't think I'm going to get the chance to do anything. 'cept read, like I always do. Maybe I'll knock of Se7en today.
Now I need to read playboy. I just looked upon the back of the book I'm reading (Hocus Pocus) and there's a review from Playboy. I want to see exactly how they review books...and more to the point why. Shit, most people aren't picking up that magazine for the latest novel greats.
Even the bumbling blind man crosses the finish line eventually...ya just gotta be patient until he gets his footing.
Aug. 23rd, 2004 @ 12:34 pm
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| » When words cannot capture what is in your mind... |
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Which, sadly, is the case right now.
Odd day, Odd night. No, the day and night were fine, in retrospect. Just an odd me. Or perhaps a typical me. I think, in one day, I managed to reach the polar opposites of every known spectrum. From hyper to lethargic, from joy to sorrow, from love to hate, from complacency to frustration, from lust to stoicism, and from vocal to silent.
Sorry if I threw anyone off tonight...just...have you ever got one of those sinking feelings something bad happened? I mean yeah, I got home to the parents fighting...but somehow I expected that. Didn't like it though...but it feels like something that happened with my brother. Ever since I mentioned him in passing I'd been thinking about him...hence why I wandered off. It's just like I have a feeling something bad happened to him.
Just adding to the random and mostly emo stuff...I want to be alone with her more. No, not for that you sickos. Just it's nice...alone together. Two words that make no sense when put together...yet they paint a picture so loving that you can't help but want to weep as you think upon it. Regardless of all the massive amounts of blah, I couldn't help but smile while waiting for 10 to come, hating every minute that passed bringing it closer. I want that again. Soon, hopefully.
In conclusion...oh how I detest having no idea what the fuck I'm doing.
Aug. 22nd, 2004 @ 10:27 pm
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| » My Sense of Aesthetics is Equivalent to My Tolerance of Idiocy... |
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In other words, this thing is fucked when it comes to interior decore, unless someone feels like helping my lazy ass out.
Random thoughts of the moment...there are two, I suppose, that aren't really random, and thus they are the only two that will get attention purely because random thoughts placed upon a public sight that only few will read will probably each have a purpose of their own, a way to unburden oneself in a subtle way.
Oh, and let us note now: I'm not gonna dance around it, and I'm not going to omit names. Most people I know don't know about this. And if they find it, than they did enough work to be rewarded with some detailedish info.
1. I've had this weird feeling lately, emitting from Nina. A feeling of dislike, or distaste if you will. A lack of desire to interact. Granted, at the current moment this is proving highly untrue, but up until this point it was the status quo. I wish I could read minds...it would make things so much easier.
2. Branching off of that first one...people should just be blunt. They shouldn't dance over things and just plainly speak their minds. Beyond the fact that it would make life far more interesting, due to the mostly catastrophic effects it would have upon millions who were unable to understand the pathetic attempts at subtility utilized by the vast majority of human beings I've come across. Am I exempting myself from that? Psht, hell no. But then again, I'm not usually that subtle. You wanna know something, fine. If you have the balls to bluntly come out and ask me, I'll bluntly answer you. If you don't, I'll be just as evasive in my responses as you were in your inquiries.
Ahh...I feel much better now. The best part is...only two or three people are going to read this, and that's it. Oh well. I kinda like it that way, in the long run.
Aug. 17th, 2004 @ 10:52 pm
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| » Do me a favor...if you will...and ignore that. |
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That being the mess one post below. Is it falsehood? No. It's all truth. Does anyone know the source? Of those who read this...no Not entirely. Am I still sickish? (awww, you care...yeah right) Not really. Slept it off
Want to make me feel better? Get me the fuck out of this house. As soon as possible. 'cause that's what it's all about...that is where the issue lies...oh well. Off to killing class I go. En Garde, motherfuckers.
Oh, and I'm editing this now (a few hours later) just to add this: Nice try Katy. You're getting better. Just gotta stop me from hitting you first, that's all.
Aug. 14th, 2004 @ 10:34 am
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| » So sick, so sick of being tired...and oh so tired of being sick. |
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After such a wonderful two days...I suppose something terrible had to happen. Karma or something, right? Or the unspoken law of "lets rape dan's life with a rather large, pointed stick."
I feel sick. Ill. Exhaughsted. My head hurts, I'm congested, my stomach pains me, and my jaws feel the need to clench every five seconds. And everyone around me...isn't helping. Calls from whoever the fuck feels like calling, I don't know who the fuck it really is, and I just don't fucking care. Just leave me fucking alone.
Those who could bring smiles cannot, not tonight. The pall hanging over me is settling in too deep. I think Friday the 13th finally is catching up with me, making up for the hours it missed. I need to stop thinking, to let this night end. Maybe tomorrow will be better. I just want the comfort of a loving hug, or the pleasant embrace of a temporary oblivion.
How I wish I could live somewhere else...at times like these, anything beats this.
Aug. 13th, 2004 @ 10:50 pm
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| » You know I, I could take the place of those pills, |
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ocean blue, paint it white, now who you gonna call tonight?
Today will suck. I'm signing my life away (accepting the job I no longer want at the 22 purely for sake of money) and I'm getting a bloody panorex so I can have my wisdom teeth removed sometime before the end of summer. I'm just so estatic...
I've got this weird feeling today is going to be...well...weird. I don't know why. Just a feeling, I suppose. Could just be that I'm really congested and all the muchus is collecting thruout my respiratory and digestional tracts making me feel more than a bit unwell, but I'm used that...just usually not this much. Or it could be something else. We'll see soon enough, now won't we?
Aug. 11th, 2004 @ 12:25 pm
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| » Bend Me, Break Me, Anyway You Need Me... |
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All I want is you...
It's funny. I used to think to myself "how the fuck am I going to use 750 text messages in a month." Now I'm wondering if I've run out yet, and that's only after a week really. They were well spent though.
I'm in a pretty good mood, which is a rarity since that means I've been in a pretty good mood for almost 24 hours. And that just doesn't happen, you know? I'm gonna ride this shit out til it dies. Driver's Ed. ain't too bad either, since I got really lucky and Dave Romo is in my class. It would blow a lot of cock otherwise. And yesterday just kicked amazing amounts of ass. It sucked that I couldn't hang out after Driver's Ed, but being on the phone til nigh 6 in the morning made up for it. Many times over.
I got the job at the Regal 22...but I really don't know if I want to work there. Oh well, the money will be nice to have and it won't be too rough of a job. Just annoying. Then again, I doubt they'll be uber-strict, so I'll find ways to amuse myself. Probably by making fun of my coworkers in my head incessantly.
It still seems so surreal. It'll have been a week from tomorrow that everything flipped on its head. But I think it's been for the better, and will be. I hope so at least...it'd be nice. If I ever get used to it.
Aug. 10th, 2004 @ 01:36 pm
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| » Bruised and Battered, He Valiantly Falls... |
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Warped Tour was fun...if you want to know more, read my bloody Xanga. I'm not going to write a review in this thing. That's not what I'm intending this thing to be. I will say, however, that getting my ass kicked there has fucked up this day, and will probably fuck up this night.
I felt a bit bad about basically shoving Rob out of my house as fast as possible, but dear god. My insides are fucking killing me, my head is fucking killing...my ribs and legs aren't much better. I'm not normally one to whine about physical pain, but this is just not nice. And what's worse, is I missed Dasha's tea party thingamajig, which I wanted to go to but couldn't. Not only because my parents wouldn't let me due to my own physical damages, but there is of course my voulentary reason.
If I'd pushed hard enough, I might have been able to go. But I can't do that. I hate it so much that I am the pillar of strength in this bloody family, but it's been awknowledged that it would go to hell without me. And as usual, things were falling apart and good old Daniel had to step in to keep the peace...and now that it's established, he sits here on his computer, wincing constantly because the pills he took have yet to take affect, instead of having himself a good time.
Oh wait, look at that. The peace crumbles already. Oh well, I'm just too fucking tired to fix it. Maybe Jess can smuggle me out tonight...maybe not. I need a break I won't get.
What's age, anyway? That's a question playing on my mind...does it matter that much? Will it matter that much? It matters less as you get older...but at this age it can mean a lot. Should it? Or more to the point...should I let it?
Enough with these ramblings...I just want to lay down and have another 2 hour conversation like I had earlier today with Dasha. I like those. Until then, I'll read and dream. Like always.
Ta ta.
Aug. 7th, 2004 @ 07:08 pm
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| » First Entries Suck |
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And this one will take the cake. Seriously, I've no idea what the fuck I should bother to write, and more to the point I've nothing TO write. And I really don't want to bother customizing this bitch right now, nor hunting down everyone's live journals to add to the bullshit friends lists so I can try to feel special and see like friend's only journals. Ya dig?
Tonight was a quality time...I made myself a new friend (Dasha) and had myself a time with some old friends (Lauren, Nina, Courtney) and there was Laura and Steve, who sadly, are in neither catagory. Rob and Shelby were sluts and cut out early. But between the compromising pictures, finishing second in Super Smash Bros and just hanging out, Dan actually not only managed to have fun, but loosen up and be...natural? Social? Shiiit...that doesn't sound right. Oh well. I've nothing else to say, I suppose. As I refuse to write personal shit in this. But yet, I would...hmm...maybe I'll like make those entries private. Just to piss you all off. Hahaha.
Valete, liberi
Aug. 4th, 2004 @ 11:10 pm
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